We all want to create loving, passionate, honest relationships that stand the test of time. Relationships are difficult because they ask more of us as they present to us ways of experiencing the wounds of our past. This can include wounds from childhood, peers, or past intimate partners. Often we approach our partnerships as a means to finally have the needs met that didn’t get met or to right the wrongs of the past. We tend to choose partners who we believe can heal our wounds but together we end up continuing the pattern of wounding. Recognizing our wounds and doing the work to heal ourselves is key to”showing up” as our most mature and vulnerable self.
Relationships are growth opportunities. Building a good relationship asks us to take responsibility in places where we might more naturally place blame. In order to be a more mindful and present partner you need to speak your truth even when it is uncomfortable. Clear communication requires us to truly understand both ourselves and those we choose to be in relationship with. As we learn the language necessary to speak to the specific heart of another, misunderstandings are eliminated, respect is evident and connection and trust are built.
It is my advice to invest in working on your relationship early and often to build a pattern of kindness, compassion, empathy and reverence for one another that can stand the test of time.